Top Ten Fugitive: Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus

BPD FUGITIVE PUBLICITY

Top Ten Fugitives

Wanted By The BPD

ARMED AND
EXTREMELY
DANGEROUS

Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus

DOB:  UNKNOWN
Sex: Male
Height: 12"
Weight: 10 pounds
Hair: White
Eyes: Dark Brown
Race: Bear

Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus


THE CRIME

Unlawful Flight to Avoid Prosecution; Murder (First Degree)

The Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus is being sought for his participation in the 12/26/96, murder of JonBenet Ramsey, Little Miss Colorado. Until recently, her parents, Mr. and Mrs. John and Patricia Ramsey, were our prime suspects. New information has come to light, however, that indicates this bear is responsible for the crime.


REMARKS

Occupations: UNKNOWN; possibly employed seasonally as Santa Claus or Morgue Worker

Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus, speaks French and English. Interpol National Red (Wanted) Notice #A529/11-1991 issued under Interpol file #37621/91.

Passport: French #110286

Place of birth: UNKNOWN

Nationality: UNKNOWN


REWARD

The BPD is offering up to $118,000 for information leading to the apprehension of the Unidentified Bear Dressed as Santa Claus.


If you have any information concerning this case take no action yourself. Contact the Boulder police department or the nearest Alex Hunter, District Attorney.


This Parody Copyright 1999 by Dusty Hat